There was the couch stuck in the doorway of a house we were moving out of. Realtors were trying to show the house so potential renters/buyers had to duck around the couch and broken glass from the window in that had once been in the door.

There was the office I painted with paint bought off the clearance rack in Home Depot. A buck a can for paint that is wrong and nobody in their right mind would purchase. My office is now yellow.. like working in the middle of a Lemon Drop. Which is kindof okay but the trim is BRIGHT yellow! Not only the trim but also the carpet where I tried to get off the ladder and stepped into the can of paint.

Caulking on the floor from trying to add the finishing touches to the upstairs bathroom remodel. Only it was not the kind of stuff I was used to and made a mess of the place.

The list goes on and I've been told, asked, pleaded with to quit trying to "Help save money, or just please quit helping." It seems when I try to help ESPECIALLY if it involves something messy I end up making more work for my husband than he would have had if I just left well enough alone.



Last night I saved thirty dollars on a new stamp for our business. Of course it cost the business WAY more than that if I were to charge for my time. Yet, I oddly feel rather accomplished even if my hands are black!!

My son said he needed a break and my husband told him he'd have Thanksgiving off. Son was telling me this and seemed as if he didn't quite find this amusing. Okay, I know it's only one day and what I knew that he apparently didn't know yet is that they had the weekend off.. though they do have to work tomorrow. Is he that worn out?? As I do with all of the kids I started to worry.

Then he spilled it out. At 8:00 am on his only day off he has to go to I-Hop for breakfast. "Mom, it's with my room mate and his woman, my best friend that's helped me alot and I can't turn him down." I understood him to be saying that he really wanted to sleep in but he'd do this for his friend.

However, he wasn't done. He has to go to my ex-husband's house from two to four this afternoon for Thanksgiving dinner. Ahh.. yes. Him again. I did not say it I just should know the man has absolutely no regard for the fact that we may want to spend a Thanksgiving with the kids. When they were minors it was a given that they would spend Thanksgiving with us but then he re-married and the rules changed. Civility went out the door and in stepped in selfish behavior.

I gather my son knows that too because he said, "Write this on your calendar.. I am YOURS next Thanksgiving." I smiled softly and told him to just enjoy his day.. we will see him at 11:30 am...

You see, for the last several years we've gone to Cracker Barrel. There we meet up with another family and have an early dinner. We enjoy each other's company, talk across each other and over the table. We laugh and have a good time and then every one scatters. We know they all have my ex to go to, and significant other's families. It gets to be more of a chore than I remember Thanksgiving.

My son said he'd come with us though I told him I understood if he didn't. He'll try to come and have coffee. "I can sit and have coffee and talk with you all Mom!!" He could go home and catch up on some of that sleep he's lacking too but he's going to try and come with us. What he WANTED to do was come here and have smoked turkey. My husband will smoke him turkey for him another day.

My daughter will come. I did not think, now that she is an adult she was fond of the other family. But she kept pestering me to know if they would be there and finally I asked her why she asked, she said, "Mom, they are always there.. it wouldn't be tradition if they weren't there!"

So... here's to Cracker Barrel and all of those that will be with us even if only for a cup of coffee. Here's to all of you that stop by here and read all of this, and here's to the parade cause at the end of it Santa Claus will ride in on his sleigh and THAT is when Christmas starts!! Not in October! We have another son, technically my step son.. my husband's one biological son. Last year was my husband's birthday on Thanksgiving. Last year and this year this son goes out of state with his fiance and her family. I think since he sees us every day and can't see her family very often this is a wise choice. Kindof bummed me out last year since it was his dad's birthday too.. but this is what happens as children grow up.

My oldest daughter lives a couple hours away and works today. Then she'll go home and have dinner with her children. My oldest son, heck, I haven't heard from him in a couple years.. I only know that he's still back and still okay but unemployed. But he's okay!

So it is once they become adults. Pushed and pulled because as they become involved with other people, and have children they are pulled ever tighter. I remember DREADING the holidays because the dickering started over where we'd spend what holiday. I don't want to do that to them but now that I'm an adult myself, a parent myself, I understand why my parents and my in-laws pushed and prodded us.. They too wanted to spend special times with us.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING to all of you!

Our economy is tanking. It must be because every time I turn the television on that is what I hear. However, my husband brought up a rather good point.

This has happened before. ( I have not lived in the United States all of my adult life.. so there are things I don't know. ) It will happen again. What we have MORE of is news. It's on every news channel, every news broadcast. It's in papers and magazines. Heck, it's even on talk shows!

So then his question as well as mine is that if this wasn't in the news quite as much if it wouldn't eventually resolve itself as it seems to have done other times? Is the constant news and talk about the economy not a big part of the problem causing a tendency to panic which of course makes it worse.

Maybe I'm wrong but I know, for me, myself and I.. ( sounds like somehow there's a hint of self importance there? It's meant to make sure that it's understood that I speak for nobody else.) when there is bad news on and it's on over and over again it DOES start to affect my decisions.

The very best example of this is when the sniper was going around shooting people. Every day I listened and prayed the two would be caught. As each day turned into another day I became more and more inclined to stay in the house. I didn't need to go out and risk being made a target. The LIKELIHOOD of me getting shot were to be honest extremely slim.

One day my husband decided he'd take me for a ride going further south. His plan was we'd stop in to a restaurant we'd heard was good. That would remove me from the place that I'd begun to fear. Surprise! Guess who also chose to go south? We weren't aware of that at the time and for whatever reason decided not to risk going to a new restaurant, we went to one we were already comfortable with. Thank goodness because the snipers were at the restaurant we had gone to.

I guess my point is, that if I listened to the news, if I made a decision based on what I hear like I had done with the sniper, it would be a panicked choice. One that is a direct result of the news I hear. Yes, I DO feel it in my pocket. Yes, our business is hurting and so are we but if I keep reminding myself, this isn't a first it won't be a last then I'm okay. If I keep reminding myself that the last time I made a panicked choice based on the news I did actually risk putting my husband and myself in the wrong place. So, I'm going to choose to pay attention. But I know there has to be other news happening in the world that makes this seem trivial.

I also know there are some very good things happening in the news that we aren't hearing and THAT is exactly what we do need to hear!!

Pay attention to the news as needed but make sure you grab and hang on to the good things that happen in your life..

I just remembered the most important and comical part of my daughter and her misadventures (karma) with her room mate.

She was complaining because the room mate will pull my daughter's clothes out of the drier and just toss them on my daughter's bed. And.. I know she doesn't like it. She has nursing uniforms and other clothes that need pulled out of the drier and hung up or they wrinkle terribly.

Only, if she needed the drier before I was done using it my clothes would be in a pile on my bed. Not folded, just heaped there. When I finally interrupted and pointed that out to her she told me she did it because I did that to her.

For the first time she actually HEARD me say, "I can't carry your clothes upstairs so I put them in a dining chair." It had nothing to do whether or not I wanted to take her clothes, neatly folded, up to her room.. it had everything to do with not being able to do it.

Her clothes were always folded in the dining chair. Well, at first they were. But when mine were repeatedly just dumped on my bed, I quit folding them, only flattened out the uniforms and moved on.

Why not put them in a basket you ask? She had her laundry basket and mine up in her room with dirty clothes.. I had put her clothes in a basket once and didn't see the basket again until she moved out. So, that was just a little more of her not liking what she herself does.

A young woman sat on my couch the other day and as I listened to her I could picture just tacking on about 30 years and that was me saying the same things I've said so many times. Not only to my husband but in my blog and to her, my youngest daughter.

I speak of the one that lived here for a year. The one that took advantage of what she had here. Now living in her own apartment she did something so very typical of the girl I KNEW. A friend was having a hard time living with her mom but didn't have the money to move out yet. So, my daughter let her move in. Free.

This girl apparently isn't any more appreciative of what she's been given than my daughter was when she lived here. Susan takes whole glasses of the baby's juice to her bedroom and leaves it! Hmm.. I have rings on furniture my husband made for my daughter's room after she moved out the first time. Coffee cups and baby cups all left to sit on our furniture and ruin. Not to mention, WE paid for that stuff! The list goes on, but just read back in my blog when I write about her, the conversation was the same just with different people.

My daughter will be able to cover rent with the next paycheck but nothing more. Not gas, food anything else. "I told her this Mom, I told her I didn't have money for gas. Now keep in mind she lives here free, but I drive her to and from work too! And all she could say was, 'I might have twenty dollars.' Can you believe that Mom, where's her money going?" Her voice was raising in pitch as she said this. Her frustration was almost overwhelming her. "She's living there free and SAYS she only has twenty dollars?"

This went on for an hour. I could not wait for my husband to get home. The two of us did something we haven't done in a very long time. We talked about events in my daughter's life and we laughed. We were pleased with her for once because she is helping someone but every word that came out of her mouth were things we've said over and over in the past year.

Karma... it's a comical thing isn't it?

I have bills set up to be paid. It'll come out of the check over draft protection. Hopefully I can get money in the bank before the checks actually clear.

So, as you can imagine life isn't exactly... spiffy but we're trying to make it and trying to stay afloat. In the meantime, unlike us with our business we are not at the Capitol trying to get a hand out. We are re-working what we do to keep going. We are changing the way we pay our subcontractors. We are trying to stay afloat any way we can.

Clearly the impact of our business going under is not so great as the auto companies so why would the government pay attention to us? What I need is a private jet, a 28 million dollar paycheck and make little to no changes and perhaps the government will listen. Maybe that will work??

I just have a bad, bad feeling about this bail out mess. These companies know where they screw up why not change their practices before asking for money? The American Way.. work hard, and earn your own way. In America you can be anything you want to be if you set your mind to it and spend years working to attain it. No matter how big or small what you end up with is something that is YOURS. Something you've carved your name in, a niche, a paycheck, a nice car.. whatever it is, it's yours not the government's. You can take pride in a job well done. And no amount of money, no government hand out can give you that.

So, I digress as I often do. I think if the government bails any business out it should only be in a way that will keep those hard working individuals with the paycheck they earned. I think FIRST.. before money is given to a company they should agree to let an auditor in that can go over the companies finances. One that can strip funds for private jets. One that can have a CEO paid according to the business' performance and ability to pay it's workers. If you need to ask for a hand out from the government you have not done your job because if at all possible, you should have a contingency plan. For us, a very small family business that is so small it doesn't last long. For the auto industry, if their CEO's didn't have forsight.. strip them of their pay!! Don't ask for money from the government!!

It kills me to see on the news a lady four years from retirement, looking like she squeaks by a living and someone is getting paid MILLIONS of dollars.. If the company has the money to make those kind of massivly huge salaries then maybe they out to rethink that plan and let some of that money be paid to the people that BUILD the cars. Not the ones that sit behind a desk but the people that are the backbone of those companies.

I, myself wouldn't want bailed out. I would expect that if the government kept me afloat the government would own our business until we've paid that debt off and to be honest I don't want the government in my back pocket owning the keys to everything we worked so hard for.

I hope the lesson everyone walks away from in this mess is that the American Dream is EARNED... it's not handed to you by doing wierd crafty number crunching. You must qualify for a loan, with ID, jobs and a good financial history. Cause this mess is sure hurting those of us that did do everything right and that sucks.. Just.. sucks.

Here is what I need. I need money to pay our bills again. I need to remember to ask my husband if the boys found the entire week of work they did so we can bill for it and get paid.

I REALLY NEED to get the AC out of the window!! It's...COLD!!

But, daily I'm thankful for the kids I bitch about, the husband I adore even when he irritates me. And those two little children that take up a huge chunk of my time.

I also need the dog to come back in and not whine all night long!!

My son was here today when a lady came to the door. He answered it before I got there and she was trying to hand him a flier, one that would explain "The Truth." From the bottom of the stairs I said, "No thank you." But it was my son that said, "I'll take it." She handed him the flier and was very, very brief in saying it would explain what the truth is and how it will benefit us. And.. she was off.

It is not that I am against religion, quite the opposite. I do liken those that knock on my door to telemarketers and I do dislike that intrusion on my privacy. To me it's worse to have someone tell me of their religion and try to change my beliefs than to have someone try to sell me something over the phone. At least if the person on the phone is a pest you can hang up on them. There is no face to someone on the phone, you don't feel OBLIGATED to stand there and listen. With someone at my door I feel obliged to stop my day and indulge them in whatever it is they want to tell me.

Today, I wasn't having it during the short time I get to actually visit with my son.. the Kiddo's father. But he impressed me by trying to be polite.

Go back about 22 years when a similar even happened. I lived in military housing in Germany. This same son was about 2 years old when people came and (perhaps this is why I don't like to have these conversations with strangers here.. lack of safety.) asked to come in and discuss "The Truth" with me.

I let them in and they were saying things that I so do not believe. They were saying that basically there will be the equivalent to a 40 day flood. An event that would kill off all those that sin and do not believe. I pointed out that after the flood was over God said he'd never do that again. During this debate of sorts my two year old son came out and climbed on the man's lap with his sister's leotards that had been in the laundry. I do not know why he was playing with them other than he loved the way they ssstttrreeettched and went back into shape.

My son's attention span is short, something I'm sure the man was grateful for and my son was off once again on another adventure. The man once again attempted to enlighten me by asking if I wouldn't want to live in a world where there are no sinners. To which I pointed out that it was impossible to expect that (unless it were heaven) here on earth because we would always be tested with temptation and there will be those that give in to it. You can't just wipe out everyone on earth that gives in to temptation every time it happens.

It was during this conversation that my son came out and once again climbed on the man's lap. It seems that he'd found his father's Playboy magazines and wanted to share it. I nearly fell out of my chair not sure if I should be mortified or just laugh. They couldn't leave fast enough.

Later that evening there was a conversation with my now ex-husband that if he wanted to have those magazines I wasn't going to tell him what he could and could not read but to please keep them better hidden from the children.

So it goes full circle, the son at one time tried to give them the 'literature' he found, and today he let them give him their literature. Of course, he was telling me that really it was okay he didn't mind while he went straight from the door to deposit the flier in the kitchen trash, "afterall, the Bible really is common sense I don't need anyone to tell me what's in it."

Just when did he grow up so much?

This goes with the post below

I love my daddy. I am thankful I have my daddy to love.

I am thankful for snow. I like snowgloves.

I am thankful for the bathtub to play in.

We did school work so she wasn't at home having fun. Coming up with lesson plans with nothing is rather hard. I was helping her make a book and she came up with these on her own. I wrote them down and she drew pictures then I stapled it crooked.... Go Grandma!!

Only one time did she try and do what she wanted instead of what was asked of her. I finally got tired of it and set her in her spot on the stairs but she chose to do everything BUT sit. I did the supernanny thing and kept putting her back.

When I decided I had burned off enough calories I said, "forget this." and went and heated up lunch for both of us. But only I sat down to eat. I ignored her. She finally stood up and went to the dining chair and waited. I ignored her and ate. So, then she started with "I'm hungry!" over and over and over.

I continued to ignore until I was tired of it and I very quietly said, "Not until you sit for five minutes on the stair." Quietest five minutes I've had all day!! During this five minutes I continued to ignore her though I could see her to know she wasn't doing anything other than sitting quietly. At the end of five minutes, I reheated her ..No, let me word this right, finished heating cause my dinner was still cold but I WAS going to eat it so she'd get the point. While I finished heating hers I made her go finish the task that had been the source of problems.

I am all for apologizing when one means it but she's becoming famous for apologizing to be let off her time outs or whatever it is we are doing at the moment. Yesterday she finally came out of her room and said "I'm sorry." and I asked her why she was sorry; "causing problems in class or did she want out of the room?" She said she wanted out of the room. I appreciated her honesty but told her to go back to the room. I had to send her back because both my husband and I were about to burst trying not to laugh.

At the end of it I did not make her say she was sorry. I told her to give up because I WILL always win. She finally had lunch, we did the next planned lesson.. the book and now she's getting ready to go to the store because I do not have milk and I like milk in coffee ... I NEED a cup of coffee. I deserve a cup of coffee!!

Her dad said last night he was going to try and get a car he wanted so bad he bought it off of ebay, he thinks he's just going to sell it hoping to get enough money for a lawyer and hope THIS time he'll be able to get custody of her. He hates to put the Kiddo through this court thing again but knows for her he has to do something. Just we all hate to see him rush it because the last time he jumped the gun he had no proof of her being an unfit mother... he did not win custody.. so, we wait until given enough rope she'll hang herself.